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Transcript: Episode 15: A Living Mountain

Updated: Jan 29, 2022

A Knight of Shreds and Patches Transcript Episode 15: A Living Mountain Transcript by Nick & Cameron Robertson

Note: Zee-o is a synthetic humanoid being and primarily speaks in a robotic, monotone voice.


[hurdy gurdy music begins]

Nick: Welcome, listeners, to A Knight of Shreds and Patches. An immersive actual play podcast. This episode features the talents of -

Rhi: Rhi as Pallie Fisher.

Drew: Drew Mierzejewski as Wyatt Fisher.

Aly: Aly Grauer as Zee-o.

Cameron: Cameron Robertson as Emma Blackwood and Iokua.

Sydney: Sydney Whittington as Cassidy Shard.

Nick: Nick Robertson as GM and Narrator.

Sydney: Hello listeners, this is your editor, Sydney, with today’s messages:

As always, thanks for being listeners and liking our show! If you want to share a good thought or two with us in virtual space, a link to the show’s Discord can be found in the show notes, and we’d love to have you drop in and say hi. And of course, if you want to share a good thought or two with others, spreading the word makes a huge difference for people who haven’t found us yet.

And with that, we wrap up today’s announcements and head into episode 15: A Living Mountain. And so...

Join us, for now our tale to yours attaches To carry hope: a Knight of Shreds and Patches.

[hurdy gurdy music ends]

[electronic beeping]

[robotic powerup noise begins]

Distorted Robotic Voice: Power restored. Systems online. Reconfiguring audio connection.

[robotic powerup noise fades to radio frequency static]

[over radio]

Cameron (as Iokua): Last time on A Knight of Shreds and Patches, we sadly laid the jeep to rest, she breathed her last. Then got back on the road. Finally made it to the "outpost" that Cassidy knew of and there was a giant moose head and there were racoons and I got to pet one and Pallie says I can't have one and I'm-we're going to resolve this. I'm going to get a racoon. And also we got the information about where the beast is, but mostly I got to pet a racoon.

[radio static]

Episode Start:

Nick: The Patina has been traveling north for over a day. It is hot, and the slow going through the trees means no breeze makes it to the open windows of the rig. Everyone has been cramped into the cab with few breaks to prevent anyone getting injured or ambushed outside of the security of the vehicle. What started is good natured ribbing has devolved into cramped and irritated silence. What's the first indication of your quarry and who notices it?

Drew: I think we all notice it because the ground goes from being actual ground to being treads. The treads are so big, the truck is in a tread and so we immediately go [repetitive thudding noise]. Then Wyatt goes

Drew (as Wyatt): Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Drew: And puts on the brake and stops when everything begins to jump like that.

Nick: We see everyone pile out of the truck, happy to stretch and the camera zooms out. And this new road, this very bumpy trail that you're in, as you zoom out, you can see the tread pattern of some sort of massive vehicle.

Drew (as Wyatt): Well would you look at that.

Drew: We see Wyatt go over and he kneels down to look at the treads. He puts his hand out, and we see his hand against the inside of this tread. And the space between each one of these little raised bits of Earth is about the length of his hand. It's huge.

Drew (as Wyatt): That's uh... That's pretty big,

Aly (as Zee-o): It is incredibly large.

Drew (as Wyatt): It's bigger than I thought.

Aly (as Zee-o): Are we equipped to continue to pursue it in this manner?

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah, Bot. We are. That's what the Knight's for, right Pallie?

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah...

Drew (as Wyatt): We good on this?

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah, I want to get eyes on it before we uh, commit to anything. This is uh... That's a lot.

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah, look over there.

Drew: And we see Wyatt point over to - there's a stand of trees. And then there's obviously nothing beyond those trees. And he goes.

Drew (as Wyatt): Those are the other treads. [Blows air in awe] This thing's huge.

Sydney (as Cassidy): Well, it's not gonna get away from us now.

Cameron (as Iokua): It's called "The Beast." So, make sense.

Rhi (as Pallie): [sigh]

Nick: Iokua ripples his pecs and his eyebrows in unison.

Drew (as Wyatt): You know nobody's around, right? It's just us.

Cameron (as Iokua): Y'all can still appreciate it.

Rhi (as Pallie): Uh huh.

Cameron (as Iokua): See? Thank you, Pallie.

Rhi (as Pallie): I'm here for you.

Rhi: Pats on the shoulder. [laughs] Has to reach up a little bit to do so.

Cameron (as Iokua): See? Someone appreciates me, Wyatt.

Drew (as Wyatt): I mean, I appreciate you. I'm just saying that the ripply pectoral thing that's...

Cameron (as Iokua): This?

Drew (as Wyatt): Stop.

Cameron: Does it again.

Drew (as Wyatt): [sigh]

Sydney (as Cassidy): Did you hear that Iokua? Wyatt says he appreciates you. I think that's the first time I've heard him, you know, express affection.

Cameron (as Iokua): Awww.

Drew (as Wyatt): I beg your pardon?

Cameron (as Iokua): Do you want a hug?

Drew: Wyatt stiff arms Iokua.

Cameron: Iokua is going in for the hug. So he's got arms out and just Wyatt's hand planted in his chest.

Nick: We get the shot of Iokua reaching with both hands making toddler grabby hands at Wyatt as Wyatt keeps a stiff arm and they are at a impasse for a moment.

Drew: And Wyatt turns to Cassidy and he's like,

Drew (as Wyatt): I am affectionate. I I have affection. I'm a natural human being, I feel things. Get

back! Do-don't touch me.

Sydney: Cassidy just looks at him, and then looks at Iokua. And then back to him and raises her eyebrows.

Drew (as Wyatt): I mean-I mean - All right fine! Fine!

Drew: He goes over to Pallie and gives her a hug.

Rhi: Pallie will hug him back and good solid hug, pat on the back and then as he's pulling away, puts her hands on Wyatt's shoulders and turns him towards the rest of the group and leans in just like

Rhi (as Pallie): Now someone you're not related to...

Drew (as Wyatt): So anyway the treads. [sigh]

Nick: The next thing we see, we get a quick montage of the truck rumbling through these tread marks. And we get different angles that just further hammer home how large this thing you're tracking is. And the destruction starts to spread out. Whereas before it was two tread marks separated by stands of trees through the woods. Trees on either side start to be smashed. And before long, it's this wide swath, it's not uniformly shaped. The direction isn't quite as clear. And you all decide to break up into smaller groups to attempt to find the easiest way to find this thing.

Rhi: I think Pallie is trying to figure this thing out by looking at the signs it's left behind. So I think she's gonna want to follow one of these sort of, not the treads, but some of the other destruction that this thing has caused. So whoever wants to tag along on that adventure.

Cameron: Yeah, I think Iokua gets his great sword out of the back of the rig and heads with Pallie to serve as the muscle.

Nick: It's got a sheath that only covers the edges of the blade and leaves the flat of the blade exposed. And on one side of the blade, there's an intricate etching of a beautiful woman. And on the other side, there's a intricate etching of a very rippling muscley man. And one is inlaid in bronze and the other is inlaid in silver. So it's a very nice looking blade.

Drew: We see Wyatt go to the truck. He opens it up and jumps in the front of it. And he grabs his war belt that has his sword on at this time. And he jumps down and he buckles it on and it's got his sword, it's got his knife, it's got his pistol, and he also reaches in and pulls out one of the rifles, and he reaches into an ammo box and he pulls out three bullets and puts them in his front pocket. And we see that Wyatt is in a buttoned up shirt, undone at the collar halfway down to his sternum it's undone, and we see an undershirt underneath it. His sleeves are all rolled up, because it's hot. It's so hot here in these woods. And we see him put those bullets in his pocket. And he goes and ties up his hair, so it's not gonna fall on his face and sweat. And he looks over to where Cassidy and Zee-o are and he goes off on his own into the woods.

Sydney: Cassidy is going to go grab her bow out of the truck, until it is the moment of fighting, she's not going to take the rifle out. But she's down to her tank top and her pants are rolled up to her shins as much as she can shed some of this heat because it's pretty humid. It's... it's not a dry heat, like it was where she grew up. So, and then she's gonna walk over to Zee-o and go,

Sydney (as Cassidy): Hey, I'm gonna go find the highest thing anywhere around here and see if I can get a good sight line. Uh...What are you doing?

Aly: Zee-o has been staring off into the woods and pauses a moment then turns and looks at Cassidy and says

Aly (as Zee-o): That is a good idea. I will [pause] accompany Wyatt.

Sydney: Cassidy turns to watch Zee-o and waves and looks a little bit confused. And then looks around for the highest point on the horizon, whether that's a tree or the top of a hill, and sets off.

Nick: So, Pallie I'm going to need from you and Iokua a Mechanics check to understand this machine better.

Rhi: Okay.

Nick: So you add a blue die from Iokua's assistance. This is going to be hard.

Rhi: Hard, so that is three purples.

[dice rolling]

Rhi: And we are left with one success and one threat.

Nick: Awesome. So Pallie, you walk into the woods with the face of the group. Iokua is brandishing his sword at the trees, but is staying out of the way and asking intelligent questions. He's been with you on several trips where you needed backup. And you're able to identify a pattern to the way this thing has been destroying the trees. It's not a normal area of effect, it appears to come and go in waves and you're able to triangulate the general direction. Wherever this thing is, the pattern seems to be getting close together and you think it's probably within walking distance for you to find at least the next big piece of evidence and the two of you decide to walk in that direction and see what you can see.

Rhi: I think also what Pallie is looking for is like the trees - do they look like they're crushed? Are they uprooted? Are they cut down with a giant saw? Like, can I tell what kind of machine, what kind of tool, is cutting these down?

Nick: So what's interesting is it appears to be multiple different tools. There are places where trees obviously grew once but have been ripped up by the roots and there's no evidence of what happened to them. There are trees that have been cut down and then crushed. And there's other trees that appear to have been splintered like a kid stomping on a straw, just straight down and shattered. And then beyond that there are some that are still standing but appear to have been stripped of their leaves by tiny scorches. You're not sure what did that. But, there is a pattern to it, it does appear to have at least some sort of sense. It's not like some of the wild tech you've seen in the past that's dissolved into random impulses. So hopefully you can predict some of these actions once you get a better view.

Rhi: Pallie is gonna, by one of the trees that's had all of its leaves burned off, is gonna stop to examine that a little more closely, because that's weird.

Rhi (as Pallie): Why on earth would it do this? Like, crushing the trees makes sense, it's huge. Ripping trees up, maybe for fuel. But why this?

Cameron (as Iokua): Maybe it just really doesn't like trees?

Rhi (as Pallie): Maybe? I... I don't know. It's just, [Sigh]

Cameron (as Iokua): It does look like it has an impressive arsenal, though. I'm not concerned. I'm sure it'll be fine. We've got this.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah. Uh. Well... I've got a few concerns.

Cameron (as Iokua): Now I'm concerned because you have concerns.

Rhi (as Pallie): Well, I was hoping to test the Knight on something maybe a little lower stakes. But...

Cameron (as Iokua): That makes sense. I could see how that would be the logical thing to do, which is why we're not doing it, I think.

Rhi (as Pallie): [chuckles] Ah, well, we need a big payout too. A rock and a hard place, which seems to be where we kind of live.

Cameron (as Iokua): Yep. I think I'm gonna order curtains.

Rhi (as Pallie): [Laughs] Nice area rug.

Cameron (as Iokua): Yeah. And some like really nice squishy pillows.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah. Make it real homey in here. [contented sigh]

Cameron (as Iokua): [sigh] Yeah.

Rhi (as Pallie): You all right?

Cameron (as Iokua): Yeah. I was just thinking about earlier when we first saw the treads. I *exhale* I don't know. It's hard to get a read on Wyatt sometimes.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah, it can. I mean, I'd say I've can read him pretty easily. But I do have the advantage of several decades on everybody else.

Cameron (as Iokua): Well and he likes you. So bonus.

Rhi (as Pallie): He likes. He likes you. He likes everybody. He just doesn't know how to show it very well most of the time.

Cameron (as Iokua): I feel like he appreciates skills that we have far more than us as people. Like I may as well be this sword.

Cameron: And like dramatically starts spinning the sword so that it's going back and forth between the etching of the rippling muscled man and the also very well muscled woman on the other side.

Rhi (as Pallie): I- I don't think that's the case. If he didn't like you as a person, he wouldn't have put up with you for this long. Wouldn't put up with any of us for this long if he didn't like us.

Cameron (as Iokua): And see, my brain knows that. And it honestly, doesn't bother me all that much. I'm perfectly fine harassing him about it and trying to hug him. But I... it's not. That that's not how Cassidy is, and especially not since Owen...

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah.

Cameron (as Iokua): And you can't argue with me on this one. Wyatt does not like Zee-o.

Rhi (as Pallie): [sigh] Yeah, well, no I can't argue with that one. I'm working on him though.

Cameron (as Iokua): I just it's...[sigh] I... I am glad that you are here to help with, uh, I don't know, say providing that human interaction shield for Wyatt. I don't know, I it's - I don't know if I'm describing that correctly, but I think without you being there to be the intermediary that uh... tempers would run a lot hotter.

Rhi: As Iokua has been talking, Pallie is obviously still listening, but is looking back up at this scorched tree, and looking sort of contemplative. And I think after a moment just says,

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah, I'm... I'm glad I'm here too. I don't think you're wrong. Wyatt's doing better. Believe it or not, this is better.

Cameron (as Iokua): No, it it is. I have seen progress.

Rhi (as Pallie): [laugh]

Cameron (as Iokua): But the man needs a hug, Pallie.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah, he needs... he needs a lot of things. [sigh & laugh] And I don't know if any of us can get those things for him, be those things for him. Sometimes a man's just got to fix himself.

Cameron (as Iokua): True enough.

Rhi (as Pallie): [sigh] But Wyatt's, you know, growth and ability to accept hugs notwithstanding.

Cameron (as Iokua): [chuckle]

Rhi (as Pallie): We should keep heading towards this thing carefully. I don't feel like we could get surprised by it, given the size, but I don't want to assume anything either.

Cameron (as Iokua): You don't think it's going to just sneak up on us just like real quiet like, floating above us?

Rhi (as Pallie): Ohh

Cameron (as Iokua): Above the trees?

Rhi (as Pallie): God, I hope this thing can't fly.

Cameron (as Iokua): Oh, I wasn't even thinking that I was just thinking that the treads looks tall. No Pallie. [laugh]

Rhi (as Pallie): No, you said you said [overlapping Cameron (as Iokua): what if it was?] above the trees. If it flies, we're leaving. The Knight can't fly. If it has an aerial attack pattern, we're out.

Nick: And on that note, we see Pallie and Iokua walking through the trees now glancing nervously above them. And there is a break in the foliage up ahead. And we're going to cut away to Cassidy. Cassidy, give me an average Athletics check to climb a very, very large elder tree that seems to have survived the destruction.

[dice rolling]

Sydney: Two successes and an advantage.

Nick: Describe how you get up this tree quickly and efficiently and get a view of your surroundings.

Sydney: So when Cassidy was surveying, the tree was the tallest spot, so she did stop by her locker on the outside of the rig and grabbed her climbing gear, knowing that this was going to be a vertical climb as opposed to a nice stroll up a mountain looking out over giant death machine. So she's got her stuff she walks probably the, I don't know, 20 minutes to the tree. It was tall enough to be sticking out on the horizon like up noticeably above, but that also means that the distance is a fair bit. But she covers the ground pretty fast. There's no one with her so there's no one to try to think about matching pace with so she's pretty free to move.

So she gets to the tree and stands at the bottom and looks up and the trunk is pretty straight. And then there's all the arms and all the foliage in it. She plots what her approach is. But basically the tree climbing technique is you chuck a rope up over the lowest branch, you pull yourself up a little bit, you chuck your rope up over the next highest branch, you get up, you move your bottom rope to the top and you keep climbing up so that you're always attached to the tree. Because right before a fight with a giant death machine is not the time to be doing things without a safety factor. Cassidy would be maybe more comfortable if the fight with the giant death machine also had more safety factor. But it is what it is. So Cassidy works her way up. And it takes a fair bit but, she knows how to climb trees and there's no added complication this time of ice on the tree or any weather. It's just hot. And sweat is not a big deal.

Nick: Did you bring any binoculars or anything with you on this observation climb?

Sydney: So Cassidy has an old spy glass. It's different than the one that has been duct taped to her rifle. This is one that she actually uses when she's doing her cartography. When she's climbing up to take vantage points. The lens isn't quite as clear as the scope one because it doesn't need to be used for quite as so fine detail work. But it collapses down really small and fits in a pocket which makes it valuable for this type of work.

Nick: So we see Cassidy at the top of this tree, pretty much as far up as she can go without worrying about branches breaking beneath her. One arm wrapped around the trunk tied securely to some branches and debonairly looking through her spyglass. The wind up at this height is cooling on you, as you've gotten high enough to catch a breeze.

Sydney: It's very much vibes of the lookout at the top of the crow's nest on a ship.

Nick: Your hair is blowing in the breeze, and you see that not too far ahead of where the Patina split up to look for further sign and investigate this creature, that there's a large pit. And as you pan up, you begin to get a good view of your quarry. And then all the audience sees is you pulling the eyeglass down and your eyes widening in surprise before you begin to climb down and head that direction towards the rest of the group. And the descent down this tree is a lot faster than the ascent. Then we cut to Wyatt. Wyatt you've taken a walk alone in the woods. What are you working on?

Drew: Wyatt is trying to get a wider view from a ground level of what they're going to be up against. So he knows that the tracks are going in one particular direction. So he's going in the other direction to see if he can get as far away from it to see a wider range. Does that make sense?

Nick: Yeah.

Drew: And we see Wyatt walking through the woods. Slowly. He's got the rifle, not over his shoulder, but he's got the butt of it on the top of his shoulders. He has it at rest, as he's walking through the woods. We see him walking through the woods in a careful and slow manner, making sure not to make any noise, but trying to catch his surroundings and internalize them to make sure that everything is okay. As he tries to get a wide look at what's going on with this beast. And he's going, and as he's walking through, he stops for a moment and he hears something walk behind him and then stop. And he takes a moment he crouches slightly. He breathes and then spins around and levels his rifle.

Aly: Zee-o is not too far away from him, definitely within range of that rifle, but not like directly behind him. And they are standing very still. When he stopped walking, they stopped walking, and then they allowed him to spin around with the gun. And they stare back at him with that same infuriatingly blank, vaguely interested look on their face, their eyes glowing that bluish white light.

Drew: And Wyatt doesn't drop the rifle. He keeps it trained on the bot, and you see that his finger is not trigger disciplined. He's actually got it towards the trigger. And there's this tense moment where he's just sighting down the barrel at Zee-o. And then he goes,

Drew (as Wyatt): What do you want, Bot?

Aly (as Zee-o): I came to assist.

Drew (as Wyatt): I don't need any help.

Aly (as Zee-o): I did not ask if you needed help. I came to assist.

Drew (as Wyatt): Well, I don't need assistance. You can go back to the truck.

Aly (as Zee-o): Is there something you would like me to do at the truck?

Drew (as Wyatt): I dunno watch the truck?

Aly (as Zee-o): The truck is not going anywhere.

Drew: And there's a long pause and he goes,

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah, Fuck it.

Drew: He takes down the rifle and goes,

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah, you can come along.

Aly (as Zee-o): Did I startle you?

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah, you startled me.

Aly (as Zee-o): I apologize.

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah don't, don't like sneak up on somebody when they're...

Aly (as Zee-o): I was not attempting to sneak. I apologize.

Drew (as Wyatt): Fine. Whatever.

Aly (as Zee-o): I am just naturally more quiet than you.

Drew: Wyatt turns around and looks at Zee-o.

Drew (as Wyatt): Well. If I was a ancient wild tech thing, I'm sure I would walk very quietly too.

Aly (as Zee-o): I'm sure you would.

Drew (as Wyatt): Okay, whatever.

Drew: And he begins to walk.

Aly: And Zee-o walks along behind him.

Drew: And I feel like Zee-o matches his step?

Aly: I was just gonna say, so Wyatt a little hunchy shouldered, annoyed and out of sorts from that moment, walks on ahead with these short, aggressive strides through the underbrush and all that, and Zee-o's calm, precise, smooth gait adjusts. So the camera shifts to the side so we're watching them in like a side scroller style, and Zee-o drops their center of gravity and shifts their shoulders and walks just like Wyatt, following in his steps as he moves forward through the trees.

Drew: And Wyatt stops.

Aly: Zee-o stops.

Drew: And turns around and looks.

Aly: Zee-o stares back at Wyatt.

Drew: And then he turns forward, he takes a couple more steps, and then stops, and then looks back again.

Drew (as Wyatt): Are you mocking me?

Aly (as Zee-o): Mocking you?

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah.

Aly (as Zee-o): What does this mean?

Drew (as Wyatt): Are you making fun of the way I walk?

Aly (as Zee-o): Why would I do that?

Drew (as Wyatt): I don't know. I'm asking you.

Aly (as Zee-o): I do not think I have the capability to mock.

Drew (as Wyatt): What do you mean, you don't have a capability to mock?

Aly (as Zee-o): I do not know how.

Drew (as Wyatt): You say passive aggressive things all the time.

Aly (as Zee-o): What do you mean?

Drew (as Wyatt): Y-you say you say things. They're things that you say...

Aly (as Zee-o): Yes.

Drew (as Wyatt): And I don't get it. Because you're *fumbling mumble* a toaster. You're just a toaster.

Aly (as Zee-o): I do not believe I am a toaster.

Drew (as Wyatt): You can't believe anything. You're a bot.

Aly: And there's a long pause.

Drew (as Wyatt): All you have is programming. Someone somewhere put all that you have in your brain into there. You don't make choices. You just follow the program. You don't believe anything.

Aly (as Zee-o): There are times when I wish that it was that simple. It would be easier for me if that were true.

Drew (as Wyatt): It is that simple!

Drew: And he turns around.

Drew (as Wyatt): You are a thing. You are a machine. You are no different -

Drew: And he hold up the rifle.

Drew (as Wyatt): - than this rifle. Except you can walk and talk.

Aly (as Zee-o): And choose whether to shoot someone.

Drew (as Wyatt): I don't believe that.

Drew: He turns around and keeps walking.

Aly (as Zee-o): How do you choose?

Aly: Zee-o follows.

Drew (as Wyatt): I dunno I-

Drew: And then Wyatt keeps walking, talking backwards behind them as he goes.

Drew (as Wyatt): I don't know. I just make a choice.

Aly (as Zee-o): How?

Drew (as Wyatt): Uh see this rock?

Drew: And there's like a big rock in the middle of the wood.

Drew (as Wyatt): We go left we go right. I don't know, we go right.

Drew: And he takes a right path.

Drew (as Wyatt): There. That's a choice.

Aly (as Zee-o): I see. There are other options than right and left.

Drew: Yeah we could have gone over it I guess or you know, I could have dug us something underneath it.

Aly (as Zee-o): Or moved it.

Drew (as Wyatt): Or... I mean I could I could have tried to move it. Yeah, I could have gotten the truck.

Aly (as Zee-o): I could have moved it.

Drew (as Wyatt): I'm sure you could.

Aly (as Zee-o): I find it interesting that you do not believe that I can make choices when objectively, I can see more options than you can.

Drew (as Wyatt): Just because you can see more than I can, just because you can process things differently doesn't mean you have choice. That doesn't mean you have a soul.

Aly (as Zee-o): Are choices soul?

Drew: There's a long pause.

Aly (as Zee-o): Is that what a soul is?

Drew (as Wyatt): No.

Aly (as Zee-o): They are related?

Drew (as Wyatt): [Sighs]

Drew: Wyatt stops. Turns around, puts the butt of the rifle on the ground and goes,

Drew (as Wyatt): I'm not gunna get into a philosophical discussion with you about the soul and where it is and what it does.

Aly (as Zee-o): Is that philosophy?

Drew (as Wyatt): Yes, that is a philosophical thing. It's metaphysics. It's the idea of existentialism. What makes us exist? And I'm not here to answer those questions for you.

Aly (as Zee-o): You do not know the answers.

Drew (as Wyatt): No, nobody does. We all have beliefs and theories. But nobody knows.

Aly (as Zee-o): That is distressing.

Drew (as Wyatt): And what happens when we die? I don't know.

Aly: Zee-o stops, and there's a moment where the light in the eyes flickers. It doesn't change colors it just flickers, almost as though their face is blinking, and they tip their face toward the ground almost thoughtfully. Like they're considering something for the first time.

Drew (as Wyatt): I don't know what happens. I got beliefs. I got theories.

Aly (as Zee-o): Theories.

Drew (as Wyatt): But I don't know.

Aly (as Zee-o): Anyone can have a theory.

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah. Anyone can. People can. Bots? I don't think so.

Aly (as Zee-o): That is something you believe.

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah. I guess it is.

Aly (as Zee-o): Simply because nothing has ever proved you wrong.

Drew (as Wyatt): [laughs]

Drew: He turns around, he goes,

Drew (as Wyatt): I've been proven wrong lots of times.

Aly (as Zee-o): By a bot?

Drew (as Wyatt): By a bot? Well, yeah. Yeah I have.

Nick: And I think that's a great point, to roll your Knowledge Wild Tech. It's going to be average difficulty: two purples. But, I want you to upgrade one of those to a red because you've been spending more time talking about metaphysics than researching the robot at this stage.

[dice rolling]

Drew: That is one failure and one advantage and I know exactly what happens.

Nick: Oh, by all means, go ahead.

Drew: So Wyatt is sitting there talking about metaphysics, he's like,

Drew (as Wyatt): I don't know. Sure, yeah, I've been... a couple of

Drew: And he turns around and steps right into a hole. It's a part of this giant pit that's been dug by this thing. And he literally falls six feet [Thunking Noise] into this. He just steps right off of that and falls six feet and lands and rolls falls another five feet from there. And you hear this.

Drew (as Wyatt): [Yells, and thunking noise, further yelling and thunking noise]

Aly: I think the camera stays on Zee-o, who stares blankly after him.

Drew: And we see Wyatt laying in the dirt. He's like,

Drew (as Wyatt): [Groans in pain]

Drew: He like pushes himself up on his elbows. And he looks out. And there is just nothing but this hole.

Nick: Yeah. So what you take as a hole is... Well you're right. It is giant, it's kilometers across. This is a strip mine. The sun is starting to set and it's not quite low enough in the sky to obscure everything with silhouettes. But staring across from this small ledge that you've landed on, you can see this massive monster; this piece of wild tech that you've been hunting for months, that you thought was maybe just a legend, that a bear skin wearing trader in the woods tried to warn you away from, and you know, you're going to need the entire Patina to deal with this. Even planning, even talking about it. They're going to need everybody there to keep up the momentum you've built to even want to tackle this.

Aly: After Wyatt's dawning realization of what he's fallen into. The camera angles upwards back over his shoulder from whence he came. And Zee-o's head comes into view and they say

Aly (as Zee-o): Did you choose to fall into a giant hole? Or was that not a choice?

Nick: And the next thing we see is the Patina reassembling. Iokua and Pallie have found a good vantage point; they were the first on the scene. Cassidy got the best view but realized that she should be with the rest of the group when they start to assess what information they're going to need and met up with them. After a few minutes of quietly staring at this creature. Wyatt and Zee-o head around the edge of this giant hole in the ground. It's bigger than if a meteor had struck. It looks almost as if a god reached down from the sky and with a massive hand, scooped up a piece of the earth and carried it away. And Wyatt and Zee-o walk to the group. Wyatt surreptitiously brushing dirt and dust off of his clothes.

And the sun is getting lower. You're standing a few meters back on hardpacked earth right before the rough edge of a cliff. You're on the edge of what can only be this massive strip mine. On the far side of the void, you can see your goal. You all assess it together. It's digging into the side of the earth, tearing apart the very ground you stand on for materials like food. It looks like it hasn't been touched by human hands beyond memory. Trees grow in the cracks of its armor. A carpet of moss settles along the top of the creature, making it look like a living mountain. It has to be at least the size of a ten story building. Four turtle-like legs ending in massive spikes cling to the walls of the far side of this mine. While the creature is slowly propelled upwards by caterpillar tracks that run the length of its bulbous body. What you would think of as the head is at the end of a long crane arm, a solid block of steel that it's using to hammer away at the rock. The debris is shattered and scooped by a giant saw blade at just below the head that's at least twice the size of the rig you arrived in. Smaller saws and drills extend from gantries that line the main body of the machine. Conveyors carry shattered rock and twisted wood into the belly of the beast where it must be further processed. One more thing grabs your attention. It's difficult to see from this distance, but on the back of the machine. You think you can see scuttling movement and the spark of arc welders.

Rhi: I think Pallie has borrowed Cassidy's scope to try and get a better look at this thing to analyze it as much as possible. She lowers it and just shakes her head and is like

Rhi (as Pallie): This is... this is gonna be tough.

Sydney (as Cassidy): It's pretty big.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah.

Aly (as Zee-o): It is enormous.

Drew (as Wyatt): Do we have a first aid kit?

Cameron (as Iokua): Uh yeah, it's in the truck.

Drew (as Wyatt): Ah, thank you.

Drew: Wyatt is bleeding in a different couple places.

Rhi (as Pallie): What happened to you?

Aly (as Zee-o): He fell into a hole.

Cameron (as Iokua): Why'd you do that?

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah?

Drew (as Wyatt): It wasn't by choice. All right?

Aly (as Zee-o): Oh, it wasn't?

Drew (as Wyatt): Nobody decides just to fall into a hole.

Aly (as Zee-o): One could in theory.

Drew (as Wyatt): Well, yes, one can in theory, but one does not, because usually that means pain. And humans do not like pain, which you would understand if you were human!

Drew: And he turns around, and he walks to the truck.

Cameron (as Iokua): I was gonna say I'm pretty sure if you purposefully fall into a hole that's called jumping.

Sydney: Cassidy winks at Iokua.

Drew: We hear the door slam on the truck as Wyatt comes back with a first aid kit and he opens it and starts getting out stuff to clean his cuts.

Aly (as Zee-o): Wyatt.

Drew (as Wyatt): Yes?

Aly (as Zee-o): Would you like assistance?

Drew (as Wyatt): Sure. Iokua, do you want to help me over here?

Cameron: Iokua was standing there with his arms crossed and looks to the side at Zee-o and says,

Cameron (as Iokua): Sure~?

Drew (as Wyatt): Thank you. I appreciate that.

Drew: And he holds up the medkit.

Cameron: And walked over and grabs it.

Drew (as Wyatt): So what are we going to do?

Rhi (as Pallie): [sigh] Well, let's start by making camp and figure out a plan.

Nick: And we will cut away from there. We see the Patina gathered around a very small low fire. You've stepped back into the woods, put the truck in between you and the Beast and you have just enough light to see by. One of you has a long stick and is tracing diagrams into the dirt next to the ashes to show who's doing what and you're planning your assault on probably the biggest score any of y'all have ever seen.

Rhi: I think Pallie is the one sketching out the plan. Pallie marks a couple symbols on this rough map of the strip mine this like

Rhi (as Pallie): Okay, so... phase one: we got Wyatt in the Knight on distraction. Iokua in the rig foot soldiering for the Knight, make sure any of the little things it's got on it aren't giving it a problem. Cassidy, shooting at it if you can get an opening on something, but mostly, we'll get the explosives lined up. Keep it herded. I'll have the detonator for the rock slide, and the Knight will lure it into the trap. Blow the rock slide and keep it from moving.

Drew (as Wyatt): Honestly, that's a pretty solid plan.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah.

Drew (as Wyatt): I like it.

Rhi (as Pallie): And then once it's immobilized, most of us I think should probably head in, well Zee-o and I'll deactivate it. But I imagine it's probably got some things on the inside that we'll need help fending off.

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah,

Rhi (as Pallie): And...

Cameron (as Iokua): Yeah I'm not confident the only of those little welding bots is on the outside.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah, I agree. But,

Drew (as Wyatt): But once we get that, we'll be as rich as kings.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah. [long sigh]

Sydney (as Cassidy): It'll be good to not have to worry about money anymore.

Drew (as Wyatt): Yeah.

Rhi (as Pallie): Yeah. What's, what's the first thing you're gonna buy?

Sydney (as Cassidy): I mean, we've been out here long enough probably a shower.

Rhi (as Pallie): [laughs]

Sydney (as Cassidy): But after that, [laughs] probably food, good food.

Rhi (as Pallie): Mmm.

Sydney (as Cassidy): Good food and a local bar with some live music and a cocktail with a little umbrella in it.

Rhi (as Pallie): Ooooh. A room of my own with a real bed. Big, big bed.

Cameron (as Iokua): A raccoon.

Rhi (as Pallie): Iokua. [sigh]

Cameron (as Iokua): What?

Rhi (as Pallie): You don't have to buy a raccoon.

Cameron (as Iokua): But if I want like a trained one...

Rhi (as Pallie): I guess.

Cameron (as Iokua): I'm not just gonna find that in the woods, Pallie.

Rhi (as Pallie): That's That's true. All right. You can buy yourself a raccoon. Just make sure it doesn't have fleas or anything.

Cameron (as Iokua): Oh, yeah, it'll be very well kept raccoon.

Rhi (as Pallie): All right.

Cameron (as Iokua): Obviously.

Sydney (as Cassidy): What? What would you have bought like three days ago?

Cameron (as Iokua): Um...

Rhi (as Pallie): Another sword?

Cameron (as Iokua): I mean, I need both hands for this one. So...

Sydney (as Cassidy): But you already have a great sword.

Drew (as Wyatt): Hang on, hang on everybody.

Drew: And we see Wyatt's sitting next to the fire. His hands go up. He goes,

Drew (as Wyatt): Does everyone here realize the amount of money we're going to make tomorrow? I mean, yeah, sure, raccoons and swords and beds and stuff like that. But, we could build a town. We could get an entirely new rig. We could start up a large mercenary company like the Iron Hazard. We're talking like sixty people, like a small army to go and do it anything we want. That's the level. If we wanted to, we could disband. Any of you could go and start a farm. Heck, Pallie, we could build you an entire workshop. This isn't just something that we're going to continue on. This could be it.

[hurdy gurdy music swells]


Aly (as Zee-o): End of episode. Commencing end credits. The following information will be placed in the show notes for your added convenience.

This has been A Knight of Shreds and Patches, an actual play podcast using the Genesys game system from Fantasy Flight Games. The show is edited by Sydney Whittington, and features the talents of:

Drew Mierzejewski as Wyatt. Drew can be found on Twitter @ worldstoforge and is the showrunner for Skyjacks: Courier’s Call, an all-ages actual play podcast set in the world of Spéir, designed by James D’Amato.

Aly Grauer as Zee-o. Aly can be found on Twitter and Instagram @ dreamstobecome. Aly is also a player on and audio editor for Skyjacks: Courier’s Call. You can support both Aly and Drew by joining their Patreon @

Rhi as Pallie. Rhi is the GM and producer of The Magpies, a Blades in the Dark actual play podcast, and the owner of Skill Check, a document accessibility service for the RPG community. Rhi can be found on Twitter @ Rhiannon42.

Sydney Whittington as Cassidy. Sydney can be found on our Discord server, which is linked in the show notes, and on Twitter @ sydney_whitt.

Cameron Robertson as Emma. Cameron can be found on Twitter @ midnightmusic13 and on Instagram @ reading_and_dreaming. Cameron is also a player on Tabletop Squadron, a Star Wars Edge of the Empire actual play podcast.

And Nick Robertson as narrator. Nick can be found on Twitter @ alias58. Nick is also the GM for Tabletop Squadron, which you can support @

This podcast features the musical talents of Dora Violet and Arne Parrott. You can find Dora at You can find Arne at

The official artwork for this podcast was created by Rashed AlAkroka, who can be found on Instagram and Artstation @ rashedjrs.

You can follow the Patina on Twitter @ akosap_podcast or visit the website:

Until next time…

...Audio Offline.

[hurdy gurdy fades]


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